Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Quality vs. Quantity

In my days leading up to my quarter life crisis I have come to another 'Ah-Ha' moment that I will take into my new chapter of my life. I can remember in my middle school and high school days you weren't cool or 'popular' unless you had a ton of friends and people knew who you were and talked about you because it was better to be talked about than not. I have to admit I was one of those people who had a ton of friends but how many were good friends- friends that would be there for me on a bad day, or when we were off in college, when we graduated college, etc. honestly not many. As I've moved through life I have always had people around me and people I would call friends but when you really boiled down to it I still could count on one hand how many of those people were my true friends no matter what. I have learned that it isn't about how many people you can surround yourself with but rather who is going to build you up when you're down or laugh at you when you say something stupid and be that shoulder to cry on when you're heart is broken. 
  Over the last couple years I have shifted my desires of how I spend my free time, yes a few years ago I would fill my free time with drinking, friends, boys, and having a good time and I think everyone should have those moments in their lives but then with my age, maturity, and my passion for my career slowly my priorities changed and now I truly value a night in reading a good book or watching a movie or even talking to my best friend on the phone. It's those good friends that you can call after avoiding their phone calls and texts for days on end because you're so busy with work or just don't feel like talking to another person but they know that and don't hold it against you. 
  I have always prided myself in having people always know where they stand with me- I never beat around the bush and always say it like it is. For some my personality is to harsh for them but that is also why they probably aren't in my inner circle. So a good friend of mine had said to me that when you expect people to be as good as a friend to you as you are to them you set yourself up for disappointment and to not expect what others can't just seem to give. In that moment I realized once again how for a moment I regressed back into my early years of having 'friends' and holding them to the same standard I would as one of my best friends. That isn't fair. 
  I can honestly say that I have two best friends in the entire world and while one has been there through the awkward years of school and we've grown up together and the other who has entered my life as an adult I cannot be more happy to share my life with them and for them to share theirs with me. It is a honor to call them my best friends and I would rather have these two women in my life than dozens of friends because what they contribute to my life could never amount to what the dozens of friends could contribute. 
  I leave you with a quote that I find sums up friendship well. 

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